Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Spam Folder Mashup

Luv, luvvv the gmail for filtering out all of the cheesy, half-literal spam meat that would otherwise soil my inbox. Here are some of the gems I found in the spam box:

Dreamin' of having a huge schlong, like black bros have? Now that's not a problem!
[Would be awesome if this turned your thang brown]

who would like to get laid by such a tiny phallus as yours?
[*sob* ... nobody ... (looks for credit card)]


Forget about failures in bedroom. With your new bigger dic'k you're doomed to success!

But please don't be deterred by the word "repl1ca"...I'm talking about the cream of the crop of repl1ca w4tches
["Yeah, baby, this here's a genuine repl-one-ca w-four-atch girl. You don't know nuthin bout a repl-one-ca... I got a huge shlong like black bros too, by the way."]

If you can hide your penis behind your cell phone...CHECK NOW A real thunderstorm in your pants.
[(Looks at iPhone. Looks down. Looks at iPhone. Excuses self to restroom.)]

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